So this morning the whole gang got to eat breakfast together since Charming is out of school for the week. I cheerily whipped up some scrambled eggs and called in the troops for feeding.
Lou Lou dutifully came to be buckled into her high chair, and Buttercup ran in screaming (with a slight smile on her face). Charming followed close behind crawling on all fours pretending to be a bear. I very sweetly told him to knock it off and come sit up to the table.
Rather than quiet down for the blessing on the food, Buttercup continued the game, but instead of screaming and running she became the predator, roaring fearfully with a death look in her eyes. Charming, with his head bowed, arms folded, and eyes closed, began a menacing growl deep in his chest that filled the room with the threat of an imminent attack. He peered at Buttercup like she was something to eat, and her lip trembled. She pled, "No Daddy! Be a frightened small child!"
I think she's learned her lesson? And I've learned that my sweet little girls are learning no mercy, not even for small children like themselves.
Why do you hate me? It is a question I have been longing to ask throughout the years, ever since I noticed the continuity of really ugly, loud, repetitive frog-like hiccups and torturous periods.
Did you not see what a sweet toddler I was? Instead you cursed me with nightly leg-aches that plague me to this day (and then decided to pass them on to dear, sweet Buttercup I might add). You filled my teenage years with acne and klutzyness. Why do you still insist on daily stubbing my toe and kunging my elbow on a passing wall/dresser/lamp? It would be nice if once in awhile you would kindly do your job and send my brain a signal that my limbs are so long and there are big objects obstructing my path and thus my arm/leg/head/hip perhaps ought to move over a bit to make room.
I have tried so hard to be kind to you--reaching out to you with the hand of friendship by doing endless step-aerobics, washing my face nightly, and eating vegetables. But those gestures of love you have thrown back in my face like a slap. What was with those terrible pregnancies and the so-not-necessary extra weight gain? Why?
I will never give up, because that would mean the war is over and you have won. But I do have a small request for you. It shouldn't be too difficult to handle. When you decide to smite me with a physical abnormality/disease/bothersome random symptoms, could you please make it clear what the actual underlying problem is? I'm really sick of these guessing games, so really it would help us both out if you could just be open and honest. And then give the doctors proof that I'm not a hypochondriac the next time they decide to do an expensive test/procedure.
Body, I know we've had some rough times, but we could start over and begin a new relationship right now if you're willing to cooperate. I want to love you. Please trust me. Please stop the madness.
First of all, thank you to those of you brave enough to vote on my blog background. I actually have a site meter, and so I can see how many hits my blog gets a day and where they come from--not exactly who you are, so it's not super stockery. Anywho, the point is that I know more people visit this blog than the amount that actually comment or participate in polls. That's fine if you wish to remain anonymous, but seriously, I highly doubt I would be creeped out by your blog-stocking, rather I would be flattered by your interest. So, if you're up to it, make yourself known!
So (obviously) I did pick a new background that I feel very comfortable with. It's casual, cute, and not over-the-top--kind of like me. I always like to be presentable but in a cute and casual way. Still, you'll be hard-pressed to find me with glitzy jewelery; simple earrings and maybe a bracelet to church are about as far as I go. Those things are attention-attracters, and I'd rather my jewelery or my hair or whatever not become the focus of people's thoughts. I suppose my ultimate goal in dressing up etc. would be for people to subconsciously approve of me and then move on. For example--if someone tells you how beautiful your makeup is, that might actually be a clue that you have on too much makeup. Just the fact that your makeup has made it's way into the forefront of another person's thoughts should tell you that it's a bit overdone. Makeup should beautify and enhance one's features, not create what is not there originally.
Wow, that was a diatribe. I feel that now I have blogged once again I have several things that may or may not be of interest to all of you who compose the elusive internet. I think my main issues are 1) I have personal issues going on that distract me from fun day-to-day things. This obviously needs to change in order for me to enjoy the little things in life, which tend to make up the bulk of life's enjoyments. And 2) I believe I have a slight fear, or perhaps shyness is the correct word, of boring my friends, family, and random strangers to death. My new goal is to not over-analyze before I blog. Rather, I am going to enjoy the process (hopefully). We'll see how it goes.
Much love to all--friends and stalkers alike!
EDIT: I just remembered a wonderful compliment a friend of mine sent me on facebook this week. She told me how nice I looked at church and she liked my hair. I wanted to clarify (especially to her if she is reading this) that her words gave me warm fuzzies and made my day. I was in no way referring to her compliment when I was talking about people noticing your hair or makeup. Love ya! That is all.
I've been deliberating for the last 15 minutes if I wanted to blog. I mean, all signs point to Yes! You haven't blogged in over a week Megs! But guess what?
I.
Don't.
Care.
I suppose that statement could be somewhat misleading--indeed, I wish I cared. I wish that I had several entertaining blogs ready to spring on the world. Truth be told, there have been some flickers of ideas where I think, "Ah! I should totally blog about that." But then the moment passes and it's gone.
To sum up, I have lost the motivation to blog. I promise this is a temporary disease--because I love blogging, it's so fun--I just need the proper motivation to spit out my random thoughts. So there you go, my blogging about not blogging. Now next time, perhaps I will concentrate this energy into an actual post.
So today I went to the doctor for an issue I've been dealing with for some time. Actually, it's an issue that has been checked over by the doctor before, with tests done and the whole works. In my previous experience after my complete checkup I was told "Despite all of our high-tech expensive tests and procedures, we don't know what's wrong with you. But whatever it is, it doesn't seem to be hurting you too much so just deal with it".... or something that sounded a whole lot similar in my head.
The "issue/problem" has progressed recently and made me anxious (see previous post) so I went back to visit the doctor. Although apparently she had my entire medical history right there on a clip board in front of her, the nurse asked me all the same questions I had been asked previously and made me fill out a questionnaire I swear I had filled out the last time I graced their office. She then informed me that one of those expensive tests/procedures needed to be done, and after some protesting I gave in.
Finally the doctor came in and performed the expensive test/procedure, all while asking me the same questions the nurse had just asked 10 minutes before. Goodness, couldn't the woman have taken one minute to peek at the infamous clipboard that contains all my medical history during the 10 minute interval I had to sit in a very unappealing gown that was precariously velcroed together around.... around me?
At the completion of this expensive test/procedure the doctor said she was interested in performing yet another expensive test/procedure to just "take a peek" and see "what's going on". I informed the good doctor that that expensive test/procedure had already been done to me and with no interesting results. She smiled sweetly and informed me again that she'd "like to take a peek"--who knows, something might have changed! I sighed and traipsed over into the special room where I received the next expensive test/procedure.
Eventually I ended up back in the original room with the doctor, who informed me that my test came out perfect and there was nothing interesting to learn from it. I already knew that--see above. Seeing my frustration with her lack of helpful new information or ideas, she then suggested yet another previously performed expensive test/procedure. I again informed her that I had already had that expensive test/procedure and it had come out fine. She believed me. Yay!
With a sigh the doctor informed me that "Despite all of our high-tech expensive tests and procedures, we don't know what's wrong with you. But whatever it is, it doesn't seem to be hurting you too much so just deal with it. If the problem continues, please come back in a few months and we'll see what we can do." ...(or something that sounded a lot similar to that). Not on your life--I can definitely see a pattern forming here.
I drove home feeling like I had just been to the auto-mechanic (not that I've ever actually been to the auto-mechanic, that's Charming's job:P). I went in to have the specialists figure out what was wrong with one particular thing, and somehow I left with unnecessarily rotated tires and brand-new brakes! Do you ever feel like you get the whole run through at the doctor's office? Like they're not listening to what you're saying or interested in anything beyond their own limited ideas and expensive tests and procedures? So. Frustrated.
