Why can't we be friends?

First of all, thank you to those of you brave enough to vote on my blog background. I actually have a site meter, and so I can see how many hits my blog gets a day and where they come from--not exactly who you are, so it's not super stockery. Anywho, the point is that I know more people visit this blog than the amount that actually comment or participate in polls. That's fine if you wish to remain anonymous, but seriously, I highly doubt I would be creeped out by your blog-stocking, rather I would be flattered by your interest. So, if you're up to it, make yourself known!

So (obviously) I did pick a new background that I feel very comfortable with. It's casual, cute, and not over-the-top--kind of like me. I always like to be presentable but in a cute and casual way. Still, you'll be hard-pressed to find me with glitzy jewelery; simple earrings and maybe a bracelet to church are about as far as I go. Those things are attention-attracters, and I'd rather my jewelery or my hair or whatever not become the focus of people's thoughts. I suppose my ultimate goal in dressing up etc. would be for people to subconsciously approve of me and then move on. For example--if someone tells you how beautiful your makeup is, that might actually be a clue that you have on too much makeup. Just the fact that your makeup has made it's way into the forefront of another person's thoughts should tell you that it's a bit overdone. Makeup should beautify and enhance one's features, not create what is not there originally.

Wow, that was a diatribe. I feel that now I have blogged once again I have several things that may or may not be of interest to all of you who compose the elusive internet. I think my main issues are 1) I have personal issues going on that distract me from fun day-to-day things. This obviously needs to change in order for me to enjoy the little things in life, which tend to make up the bulk of life's enjoyments. And 2) I believe I have a slight fear, or perhaps shyness is the correct word, of boring my friends, family, and random strangers to death. My new goal is to not over-analyze before I blog. Rather, I am going to enjoy the process (hopefully). We'll see how it goes.

Much love to all--friends and stalkers alike!

EDIT: I just remembered a wonderful compliment a friend of mine sent me on facebook this week. She told me how nice I looked at church and she liked my hair. I wanted to clarify (especially to her if she is reading this) that her words gave me warm fuzzies and made my day. I was in no way referring to her compliment when I was talking about people noticing your hair or makeup. Love ya! That is all.

Ode to a Friend

The first time we met I remember thinking how absolutely kind and beautiful she was. We connected instantly and bonded over teenage-girly things the way teenage girls do. There was never a moment of awkwardness or wondering if the other wanted to spend her time with you. She was there for me through all my highschool crushes and understood my up and downs of insecurity that came naturally with the territory. In return, she was always quick to share her heart with me and I loved her for showing me parts of her soul that were sensitive and sacred.

When the time came to go to college, she was the one who figuratively took me by the hand and introduced me to the world of adulthood and responsibility. My first roommate, we laughed and giggled into the night--and all day--and then into the night again. There was never another individual whom I could have lived with so well for so long. I remember one night I was sick in bed, moaning from pain. She cried too, and ran to help me like I can only picture a mother doing.

And then the time came when I had to leave her. Although I had found another best friend in my husband, she wasn't being replaced. She was gracious and understanding when I sold my housing contract to a stranger--who she had to live and share a room with for several months. Still she has continued to be apart of my life, although only a small part, from a distance. Phone calls, emails, quick visits when we are both in town are the story now-a-days.

Her life has not been easy. Everything she has, she has worked and paid a price for. She has the strength to face the world that I only wish I could muster. And yet she continues, not just surviving, but thriving in a world that would be harsh. Bearing her own burdens, she also carries some of the load for those around her. I think of her more than she knows. I miss hearing her laugh everyday, spending time with her. I hope she knows how amazing she is--how much I admire her wit and courage and perseverance.

Thank you so much for your friendship. I love you, happy birthday!